♣ Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Im having gastric now.its painful.
I eat only lunch yesterday.
I seriously, dont feel like eating.
I have no appetite.
And crying theraphy doesnt work.
Now im delaying my MP stuff that to be done this week.
Im procastinating now.
Meeting on thursady,and my group members still have not done anything yet.
See i dont wanna be group leader.
I have prepared documentation for the project.
Its not decided that im holding roles on documentation.
But looking the way im doing now,im look like im the group leader.
The things is i just dont want to have pile of works to be done at the eleventh Hour.
Seriously,im not gonna be group leader,my expectation will be high and more fights may occurs.
Whatever you wanna call me."perfectionist"
i badly in need his hugs and his kisses
to ease my pain and sorrows.
I wanted to meet him yesterday, but he seems to be busy.
But im ok with it.
I dont complaint,because i really tried my best not get upset easily.
I really tried my best.
You see,the least i ask for ... i dunoe how to put in words.
My presence doesnt seems to work on him.
Instead i feel i was a stranger to him.
But what enlightened me was i still see "dear" word from him.
I couldnt imagine,if that happened.
Im gonna bang,bang myself. Real bang bang boom.
Remember that day we lunch-dinner at pizza Hut.
That letter,was supposed to give you confident, that we are gonna last forever.
Your tears make me feel guilty the other day,seriously its was warm droplets.
It wasnt supposed for you to cry,if it is meant that way,
I shudnt pass to to you in the restaurant. But it wasnt supposed to be that way.
It was supposed to tell you that im always loving you,no matter what.
I was happy that i knocked some sense and did touch your heart.
i was so happy,totally happy. Totally in love.
But now..
why drifting now?..
i never asked for more.
You said you want me to be in love with you,
I DID IT.I was in love.I told you i will do whatever you want.
I know it sound so pathethic of me saying this.
I actually told myself to blog less about our problems
but more of our good memories
& it started again.
I have no one else to cry on,a shoulder to lean,the only person who i share with is YOU.
OMG,why things happened this way.
Never could i imagine this could actually happened.
This may there are alot of break up stories i heard.wth.
i was so confident that it will not happen to me.I was wrong.
OoooO
Happy 20th Birthday Zahirah!
Hope you gona enjoy whatever we had done for you.
See you soon.
Im sorry if ever i cried or down when celebrating your birthday.
Sesungguhnyer aku tahu, ko tahu apa aku sedang mengalami.
Have a great day to you.And enjoy later.
Lastly happy 21st Birthday Rafiq.
May you bless with your loved one soon.
And have a great day ahead of you.
Who knows.You might found something happened unexpectedly.
♥being MYSELF at 11:03 AM
